Sheri Goldner was an east coast broad who earned her comedy degree at the University of 3 C's--Catskills, Cruises, and Clubs--and performed as a stand-up across the country. Her writing credits range from co-creating a sitcom pilot "The Family Jewels" to co-creating the highly successful interactive off-Broadway show "Grandma Sylvia's Funeral" (published by Samuel French), in which she portrayed the daughter-in-law everyone loved to hate. TV credits include "Becker" and "The Man Show." Sheri is gone now, but not forgotten.

Maria Conchita Consuela Conchetta Chaquita Juanita Lopez swam from Cuba to Florida caught her breath, then swam the entire Gulf to Mexico and ran like hell across the border. She is now an O.T.I. (Orderly Training In) at Hidden Valley Rancho. The length of her name is only superseded by the length of her attitude.